How can you use coaching in everyday life?  The questions raised during coaching are applicable in many venues of life.  For example, as a faculty member of Beulah Heights University I am often advising students concerning degree and course choices, as well as providing coaching concerning vocational choices.  After completing the coaching program I find myself asking more questions than giving answers.  Usually, as students consider the right questions, they come to their own answers.

Also, as a pastor I now find myself in what were once counseling situations, only now I am more likely to use coaching techniques rather than typical counseling methods.  It is always empowering for people when they define their own dreams and chart their own strategic plan for achieving those goals.  

As a life coach I am not that sage advisor who pours out reams of wisdom, but I am someone who helps to turn the mirror back upon the the other person so that they can examine their own life, motives, goals and dreams.  Even as a parent I am in a place where I can talk to my children in such a way that they are allowed to dream their own dreams and move toward goals that they choose.

God has a plan for every life and when a person is encouraged to look at how God has already been working and consider what this means in terms of God's giftings and the talents in their lives.  This is usually a good way to determine the trajectory of their life in terms of God's will and plan for their future.

SIDETRACKED

Admittedly, I have not been keeping up with this blog.  In fact, many of my goals, as SMART as they were, have yet to be realized.  Why?  Life happens.  The demands of my two roles as pastor and dean, my position in the Oreo generation sandwiched between the needs of my aging mother and my teen and young adult children, have all converged to create the perfect storm of distraction and have sidetracked me from staying on target with my own goals. 

So how does one deal with unplanned yet unavoidable life issues that get us off track?  Using the track metaphor, one can imagine a train off track and draw some parallels:  First, it is easier to stay on track than it is to get back on track one plans have been derailed.  One stays on track by anticipating potential problems down the line and planning to deal with them before they become a crisis.  Second, if the unexpected, unanticipated, and unavoidable happens and you find yourself beside the track rather than on track, then one needs to be prepared to ask for help.  No train gets back on the tracks without the assistance of a crane or other equipment needed to get the train back on the tracks.

When it comes to asking for help, consider carefully who you ask.  You may need to get a life coach.  In fact, it is recommended that every coach also have a coach.  The crane that comes to get the train back on track will likely come on the car of another train.  Be sure to ask a person with the skill set or knowledge necessary to help you in your specific area of need.  For example, I was worried about my aging mother living alone in the country of West Virginia.  So, I bought a house for her that is right on the path of my sister's drive to and from work as an RN each day.  Now she can stop by and keep and eye on our mother.

You may be sidetracked or off track from your goals, but that doesn't mean that you should close the book on your dreams.  You can get back on track and begin again moving toward your dreams and goals.

Goals for Focus and Motivation

Some people live life day by day. They just go with the flow of time and never consider the long-term implications of the decisions they make in the moment. It sounds very existential, very Jimmy Buffett-ish, but it seldom ends well. Without some sense of direction there is almost always the proverbial cliff that such a person ends up flying off of, or the wall into which they slam.

I'm not that kind of person. While I can occasionally hit the pause button in my commitment to moving toward a clearly defined goal, and I can just take a mental (if not actual) vacation from my A-Type personality, the truth is that I am by nature a goal oriented individual.

When I was in the 7th and 8th grades I had goals for my high school experience. I wanted to be the first person to get my picture up twice in the school sports' hall of fame; I wanted to be voted most athletic in my senior class, I wanted to be voted outstanding senior athlete of the year in the school; and I wanted to be the captain of the football team. Those were my goals and I was committed to them. How did it turn out? Well, I did not get voted captain of the football team (though I was captain of the wrestling and track teams), and I did not get my picture up twice in the hall of fame (I only got it up once for being the state runner-up in wrestling). However, I was voted most athletic and I did win the trophy for outstanding senior athlete of the year in our county. The point is that without any goals, I probably would not have experienced the achievements that I did.

To this day I have goals that I am pursuing. At the age of 50 my goals include my desire to finish well, and to enter into retirement debt-free. To achieve that objective I am formulating action steps that will take me step by step toward that goal. It requires commitment and focus and accountability. This is where the coach is so important, namely, accountability. It is easy to deviate from our goals and end up far from where we intended to be if we are not accountable for steps we take along the way. The coach provides support, encouragement, and accountability.

Beginning With the End in View

Most of us are familiar with GPS and use it to get to where we want to go.  I absolutely love my GPS.  I used to get lost on a routine basis before getting it, but now all I have to do is unput the location to which I desire to go and the GPS will calculate the route for me.  I can even make choices about the route, such as, the shortest route, minimize highway travel, exclude a specifice roads, and so forth.  The GPS identifies where I am and then caculates the directions, distance, and time for me to get to my goal.

I see life coaching as a GPS for life goals.  It begins with the SMART goal and then through "action steps" a route is charted for attaining that goal.  The coach is the voice that reminds us of the steps and actions that we need to take to reach our goal. 

The GPS does not set the destination, we do.  The GPS can only tell us where we should turn, but it cannot force us to stay on the course.  Our commitment to get to our destination will determine whether or not we will listen to the guidance given by the GPS.  Likewise, the coach does not set our goals, in fact, the coach does not even set the action steps, we do.  The coach is merely the voice that provices Support, Encouragement, and Accountabilty as we move toward our goal.

Too often we have a dream, a goal that we desire to reach, but often we get way off course and find ourselves either giving up on our goals, or taking the long, long, way to the goal.  As a result we rob ourselves of years of success that could have been ours if we'd had someone to remind us of our goal and to provide the guidance we needed to get there in a timely manner.

A life coach is a GPS for life in that he or she is a Guide for Personal Success.  If you need such a guide in reaching your dreams and attaining your goals, I am ready to be your GPS.

The Acronyms of Coaching

In coaching there are a myriad of acronyms used by coaches to help them think about and work through their relationship with the client.  For example, a coach and client may work through a series of exercises that will empower a client to recognize and articulate a S.M.A.R.T. goal.  This is a goal that is Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-specific.  Identifying the goal, however, is only the first step on the path to goal attainment.  It stands to reason that if you don’t know where you’re going, any path will get you there.  Once a goal is identified then one is empowered to focus and to move in a direction that will lead to one’s purpose and enable one to realize his or her dreams.

Along the journey the coach fills a role that is best defined by the Greek word paracletos, which is someone who walks along beside another as a support partner, an encourager, and an accountability partner.  In life coaching the acronym for this relationship is S. E. A. (Support, Encourage, Accountability).  A coach is always client focused and the sole role of the coach is to help the client to identify their own preferred future and then to support the client, encourage the client and hold the client accountable to their own stated goal. 

Have you identified your SMART goal, or is there a nagging feeling in the back of your mind that there is something more that you should be doing, that there is a grander narrative for your life than you are currently living?  If so, it sounds like you need a life coach. 

Life Coaching

So I graduated from Dr. Sam Chand's Dream Releaser Coaching and I'm ready to reach out and touch somebody.  The program was intense and challenging.  It is no joke.  It required a year's worth of training, supervised coaching, and hours of homework, but now I am a believer in the benefits of having a life coach.

I had to learn the difference between coaching and counseling, mentoring, and consulting.  Coaching is client driven.  My role as a coach is to help you connect the dots, to see where God has already been working in your life, and to discover where He is taking you.  As the client makes this discovery his or her purpose and passion emerges in a dream for his or her life.  Sometimes people already know what their dream is, but sometimes the dream is lurking in their subconsciousness waiting to be pulled up and cast in the form of a vision and goal for life.

After the dream is discovered and articulated, the role of the life coach is to assist the client in the formation of a S.M.A.R.T. goal.  A SMART goal is a goal that is Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-specific.  For example, a SMART goal might be: "I want to complete a book manuscript by the end of this year and solicit ten publishers for publication," or even something more basic such as, "I want to lose twenty-five pounds by the end of the year." 


Chances are that there is a dream in you.  You may already know exactly what it is, or you may just have a "feeling" a sense that there is something in you that is trying to get out and acheive something of significance.  As a life coach I can help you.  I'll be posting my website address in the near future with specifics on costs and benefits.